A Peace train of thoughts

Does not each one of us have a particular perspective – coloured by our particular history?
This can seem a handicap and can become a curse, when it fuels human conflicts – but it can become a special gift when we use the same goad to judge and exclude as a deeper opportunity to teach and learn peace.

We share one life – yet we each ‘see’ - or interpret - though a lens of personal investments.
What life is – as awareness and feeling – is common to us all – whether we elect to acknowledge it or not.
But we tend to become identified with a restlessness of thought and reaction in which we are often not very directly in touch with feeling and knowing anything. We become more or less adept at managing the unmanageable by whatever means works for life as we experience it. But in our dance and in life we also have moments of flowing connected being - or glimpses of a perspective that allows and celebrates life in its instant to be just as it is.

When anyone dis-covers anything of peace, by whatever means, it will always be an experience that is shared rather than a privately asserted reality.
In its moment, there is a quality of life that is neither compulsive, driven, manipulative or exploiting – nor anxious, self regarding, problematic or defensive.

The part of our mind that seeks to control usually reasserts itself and obscures our peace or whole souled-ness – and may well even do so in the attempt to ‘understand’, (control), exactly such matters as I address here. But even as the dance comes from the music – so our understandings need to come from our heart. First they are felt or intuited – and then we find ‘clothes’ or thoughts and phrases to fit them in the particular circumstance we are in. Peace is congruency - when what we express is one with what we are.

I find that the beauty of our dancing has a context that invites such a shared experience. There are innumerable joys in its shoots and fruits – but if it is not rooted in a willingness to join in a spirit of peace then it may be using the forms of dance to protect against real or shared experience. Rather than make such a statement into a basis of ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ judgements – is it not enough to say that we can discover a greater life than we thought we knew before – right in place where our unrecognised judgement before had worked to obscure it?

The ‘awakening heart’ cannot be anyone other than you yourself as you are, and have always been.
Not as our thinking presents its story to oneself or the world, but simply present without apology or justification.

The forms that joy delights in or expresses through are many but their light is one. In this recognition we naturally find willingness to an inclusive mutuality even in difference.
But in our tendency to defensiveness we are quick to see what is ‘wrong with’ the other or them or it. This seems to come naturally – yet it is a learned reaction.

In a desire for peace as the condition of a true appreciation of life we discover that this old habit works against us. It has to be owned and moved past or we are in effect choosing against our peace and against our own true desire. The value of peace is that it is the condition in which all things find their true relationship. What does it profit a man or woman if they gain an orientation to the world – yet lose their very capacity to feel and know the truth? Peace is far more than an absence of war. It is the unspeakable dynamic presence of life in our heart and mind as one. Unspeakable humanly – yet speaks itself perfectly where we are still enough to listen in our heart.

I have found life to be an ongoing opportunity for deepening and revealing the heart.
To be restored to a fundamental trust in our own life is to be restored to sanity – because it is the condition in which we are not playing games with our mind.
Yet I can only release the ‘obstructions’ of which I am becoming aware.

When I first danced I became aware (the dance brought to my notice) obstruction to reaching up, to moving with grace, to accepting beauty in myself, to trusting that I could be accepted and belonging amongst a community of people.... I am sure that if I meditated on this I could make a long list of ‘obstructions’ to the flow of relationship, inspiration, and expression of joy and connectedness. I am still becoming aware of them almost 20 years later – for whatever seems to rise to limit or interrupt the music, the dance and the channel of inspiration – comes to mind to be relaxed and released.

But the principle is that there are ‘places’ in us where we hesitate, hold back, disallow, withdraw or contract from the field of relational existence. These instances are not sinful or bad or blameworthy – though they may be associated sometimes with such confusion. They are like an old program running that no longer fulfils. However the program is not really the behaviour itself – but the beliefs that give rise to it. A sense of unworthiness for love is somewhere to be found in that which obstructs our innate or natural joy. To feel the courage to open into the dance even so is an opening to whole-ing – a healing in that unnecessary armouring or outmoded strategies of defence fall away and let me move!

It is a delicate matter in moving from a mode of apparent self protection into one of self trust and expression, and every case is an individual relationship because it has to be a dance of trust where willingness to enter or accept relationship is freely chosen. The condition in which peace can be discerned in our hearts and minds is always one of freedom from judgement. This is not to say noticing ‘judgements equals my bad!’ – but that they represent an old program running that no longer fulfils – and the habit is being brought to re-evaluation. Judgements have no power to be more than momentary distractions unless they are invested in, subscribed to and fed with attention and identification. It is quite possible to be more committed to being right than being genuinely happy in real relationship – but only while knowing not what you do.

To stay in with the music – with the hall or place you are in, with the hands you hold, and the group of dancers – when experiencing the result of judgement in oneself – is ego transcending. Feeling the block but not engaging fight or flight – but feeling within for a better way. - a way to become present with. The external will always mirror within and in solidarity with our dancing neighbour, we are growing a truer sense of self worth. To ‘love one’s neighbour as oneself’ is not a social manipulation – but is an expression of simple truth. The world will blind us to this while we fear love and trust fear to keep us safe. But my witness is that we are given steps as we are willing that are within our range, such that we become more grounded, calmer and grow in a natural kindness of heart.

As civilised people, we do not tend to express our naked thought and feeling openly – but rather we mask and suppress and tend to dissociate such that we are often strategically self serving. We can and generally do make society like this but it tends to be a negative cooperation: a joining in order to minimise discomfort in terms of whatever ideas are the power or fashion of the day; a joining against something defined or inferred as bad, dangerous or hateful. This is not joining in life but in illusion!

Truth is not a matter of argument or definition – nothing to think about here! Truth as I am using it is the renewal and refreshment of our spirit – the orientation of our heart’s desire. It doesn't matter if there is any such thought as mine here in anyone’s mind – but it does materialise tangible results when anyone finds or brings willingness to recognise and accept Life’s Invitation - and take a step in a greater music.

I love so many things about joined up dancing – sharing in common – celebrating what it is to be human in a larger context than boy meets girl – or boy meets lots of drum’n bass in anonymous darkness and flashing lights. But I also know that the Spirit is also right there wherever we are - offering an optimum path from wherever we seem to be – like a GPS offering the route anew with every wrong turning. So I trust that – just as I sometimes hesitate or back off or become confused amidst the willingness to live and love – so too do you all. But the heart is like a compass that we did not make and therefore cannot unmake.

Things may often seem to get worse before they can get better – perhaps because we do not want to accept responsibility because we equate it with burden or blame.
But we are not responsible to actually do the peace or do the love – but merely to become willing to undo the blocks to such presence and make it welcome.
To share common purpose with a happy heart is not difficult! To open our hearts to those who seem to want or do differently than us can seem impossible but the undoing of obstructions arises spontaneously from the willingness to look upon them exactly as they are – and not as they are presented.

I hold the experience dear of being guided and supported as a dancer within the dance itself and see this as ‘keeping the channel open’ in the whole body-mind.
It often looks a lot like having deep and serious fun – yet just as we are - and on purpose.